Have you ever wondered what it would be like when we finally meet Jesus? I have. It's times like now that it's quite fresh in my mind. You see, I just got out of the shower, and I tend to lose a lot of hair when I'm in there. I don't like it, but I figured, I have long hair, so it looks worse than it really is. Well today, as I was in the shower, my hair came out a lot, like it usually does, but what freaked me out was when I pulled out a centimeter-sized portion. Add that to what already came out, and I had an inch-thick clump of hair clogging the drain.
I don't have cancer and I'm not on chemo, but I do have MS and I'm on some intense meds for that. All I can think is that it's the meds. But you see, I prefer not to be reminded that I have MS, or that it has me. And seeing my hair fall out like that is a reminder that I'm SICK. If only, if only I could ignore it. But it's there, staring me in the face from a fist-full of hair.
Well, I prayed, as usual. God says our hairs are numbered, and I asked Him if He's keeping track of the huge loses. I'm afraid to go to the salon for fear they'll be shocked at the amount of loss, and I'll be devastated. I could ask my daughter to come and have a look, tell me if she sees any bald patches. It brings to mind my hair in my youth. My mom always cut it short. I hated that! I wanted long, beautiful hair. But my mom, being the tomboy she was, never did anything with my hair, so she made it easier on herself and chopped it off when it got too difficult to handle. I always wanted to be like a princess, with long flowing hair. To have wavy locks for a prince to . . . Okay, enough whining. My oldest just came to me and I asked her to look for any bald-patches. After looking at me like I'd either lost my mind, or wondering if she should be worried, she searched my head and found none. Thank goodness. Poor thing. I shouldn't have done that to her. SIGH
Anyway, when I stepped out of the shower, remembering that I'm sick and wondering how long I've got on this planet, I wasn't as scared as I used to get. I mean, my life is in God's hands, is it not? So, why worry about when my life will end? After all, when it does end, I'll be with HIM, with my precious Lord and Savior. The One who died for me, who loves me and cares for me more than I care for my own children. And I love them quite A LOT!
So, I imagined what it would be like to meet Him for the first time. What would our first meeting be like? I prefer describing it in a song. So, if you want to know what I feel and what I think, click HERE. To my knowledge this is a simple love song, and not meant to be a Christian song at all. It's in some chick-flicks and what have you, but listen to the words, and imagine, you're on your knees, desperate and ashamed, and terrified because you're surrounded by a majestic light. It comes from a man, a person, and power radiates from His being, a power you know can crush you and destroy you with a breath. Trembling, you lift your head just enough to see the man's feet, scarred with holes, as if a nail had been driven into them. You push back, lifting your gaze to the man's legs. His robe sparkles with light, and the words KING OF KINGS LORD OF LORDS are written along His thigh.
"Don't be afraid," He says and kneels before you, sending sparks fluttering around Him. Some land on your arm, but they don't burn. His eyes are like fire and His hair white as snow. He reaches out, His palm bearing the wounds of a nail, and slips his warm fingers beneath your chin, tilting your face to His, and . . . He smiles. A smile like none you've ever seen before, a smile that fully reaches His eyes and turns them to an amber glow. Something about them makes you want to lose yourself in their depths. His gaze tells you you're safe, that you're home. That He's your older brother and He will protect you.
Trembling and stunned, you place your fingers over His as they caress your cheek. Like a kitten, you press further into his warm, comforting hand, wanting to lose yourself in His touch.
"I know Your face," you whisper. You've seen Him before. You've seen Him in the faces of all those you have trusted, in all those who have done good to you, in all those who have loved you.