Saturday, August 28, 2010


[The picture at the bottom of this blog post (NOT the "hair" picture) is a painting depicting a Seraph. It was the picture I felt would most resemble Christ as He's described in Revelation (only without the wings and with more clothes). Of course, we'll never know what He really looks like until we meet Him in Heaven.]


Have you ever wondered what it would be like when we finally meet Jesus? I have. It's times like now that it's quite fresh in my mind. You see, I just got out of the shower, and I tend to lose a lot of hair when I'm in there. I don't like it, but I figured, I have long hair, so it looks worse than it really is. Well today, as I was in the shower, my hair came out a lot, like it usually does, but what freaked me out was when I pulled out a centimeter-sized portion. Add that to what already came out, and I had an inch-thick clump of hair clogging the drain.

I don't have cancer and I'm not on chemo, but I do have MS and I'm on some intense meds for that. All I can think is that it's the meds. But you see, I prefer not to be reminded that I have MS, or that it has me. And seeing my hair fall out like that is a reminder that I'm SICK. If only, if only I could ignore it. But it's there, staring me in the face from a fist-full of hair.

Well, I prayed, as usual. God says our hairs are numbered, and I asked Him if He's keeping track of the huge loses. I'm afraid to go to the salon for fear they'll be shocked at the amount of loss, and I'll be devastated. I could ask my daughter to come and have a look, tell me if she sees any bald patches. It brings to mind my hair in my youth. My mom always cut it short. I hated that! I wanted long, beautiful hair. But my mom, being the tomboy she was, never did anything with my hair, so she made it easier on herself and chopped it off when it got too difficult to handle. I always wanted to be like a princess, with long flowing hair. To have wavy locks for a prince to . . . Okay, enough whining. My oldest just came to me and I asked her to look for any bald-patches. After looking at me like I'd either lost my mind, or wondering if she should be worried, she searched my head and found none. Thank goodness. Poor thing. I shouldn't have done that to her. SIGH

Anyway, when I stepped out of the shower, remembering that I'm sick and wondering how long I've got on this planet, I wasn't as scared as I used to get. I mean, my life is in God's hands, is it not? So, why worry about when my life will end? After all, when it does end, I'll be with HIM, with my precious Lord and Savior. The One who died for me, who loves me and cares for me more than I care for my own children. And I love them quite A LOT!

So, I imagined what it would be like to meet Him for the first time. What would our first meeting be like? I prefer describing it in a song. So, if you want to know what I feel and what I think, click HERE. To my knowledge this is a simple love song, and not meant to be a Christian song at all. It's in some chick-flicks and what have you, but listen to the words, and imagine, you're on your knees, desperate and ashamed, and terrified because you're surrounded by a majestic light. It comes from a man, a person, and power radiates from His being, a power you know can crush you and destroy you with a breath. Trembling, you lift your head just enough to see the man's feet, scarred with holes, as if a nail had been driven into them. You push back, lifting your gaze to the man's legs. His robe sparkles with light, and the words KING OF KINGS LORD OF LORDS are written along His thigh.

"Don't be afraid," He says and kneels before you, sending sparks fluttering around Him. Some land on your arm, but they don't burn. His eyes are like fire and His hair white as snow. He reaches out, His palm bearing the wounds of a nail, and slips his warm fingers beneath your chin, tilting your face to His, and . . . He smiles. A smile like none you've ever seen before, a smile that fully reaches His eyes and turns them to an amber glow. Something about them makes you want to lose yourself in their depths. His gaze tells you you're safe, that you're home. That He's your older brother and He will protect you.

Trembling and stunned, you place your fingers over His as they caress your cheek. Like a kitten, you press further into his warm, comforting hand, wanting to lose yourself in His touch.

"I know Your face," you whisper. You've seen Him before. You've seen Him in the faces of all those you have trusted, in all those who have done good to you, in all those who have loved you.


  1. Oh, Sandi, it's so inspiring to see your faith and know that God is walking so close to you. He's giving you glimpses of His glory so that you can see beyond this "light and momentary affliction." I'm praying for you, sister.

  2. Sweet, Dena. Thank you so much for your kind and encouraging words. I can't tell you how much your prayers mean to me. xxx

  3. What an inspiring post! If anyone doubted that you're a gifted writer, this posting with its lyrical prose, not to mention its heartfelt content, would prove them wrong. Thank you for sharing your innermost thoughts with all of us.

  4. Amanda, I'm so tickled and touched by your encouraging words! Thank you! xxx

  5. I love the artwork here. It is a beautiful and slightly fearful image. the last lines remind me of the song have you seen Jesus my Lord, "The face of Christ on your brother." One of my favorites

  6. Hey, girl! Glad you liked it. I just think it's awesome! Hugs!

  7. Sandi,

    I dreamt with the word 'Jesus' last night. Saw it spelled out and i googled what it meant and ran into your blog. Of course there are no accidents. It is a wonderful site, full of inspiration and peace. Jesus is watching over all of us and he never abandons us. Continue on your journey and we will all send you positive energy. Remember, the collective consciousness travels and is limitless. God bless you.

  8. Wow, Karen! I'm so glad you found "me." :-) And what an interesting post you landed on. A lot has changed since then, and instead of losing hair in the shower, I now have cancer and am completely bald! Sorry if this shocks you. But know my spirits aren't in the toilet or the shower drain. lol If you click on the castle picture at the top of the blog, you can catch up on the latest details.

    AND . . . if you'd like to learn more about the name of "Jesus," see the right-hand column. There's a large yellow box that will take you to a long-winded post about how we got the name "Jesus."

    Thanks for stopping by. I hope you can find encouragement here.

  9. Every time I stop here and read, I am inspired and encouraged. Thank you for letting all of us share your thoughts. They are pretty profound given what you are going through right now. You are always in prayer, my friend. I love you very much.